Montreal Canadiens: Time for new shoes

As a letter carrier I have sometimes had the misfortune of stepping in dog poo. I avoid it whenever possible, but sometimes I just don't see it and put my foot down wrong. Then, attempting to tidy up, I scrape it off my shoe, leaving it all over the sidewalk. Even then it usually necessitates a power washing with a borrowed garden hose. Once I actually just gave in and tossed the shoes.

When it comes to the Habs, they too new shoes, or in their case, skates.

I've seen a lot of hockey, and a lot of Canadiens hockey in particular. Even when they were routinely Cup champs they still sometimes stepped in a pile and dragged it all over the ice.

But last night had to be one of the worst starts to a hockey game by the Montreal Canadiens I've ever witnessed, bar none.

I suppose I could just pick it apart, but I did so on twitter along with a bunch of savvier writers and today I'm too tired and jaded to do it.

But here's my five cents worth — really only two cents but adjusted for Quebec taxes.

A lack of communication is mucking everything up

Remember how Kirk Muller used to stand behind the bench with a headset in one ear? The other ear would be tuned towards Jacques Martin, and Muller would usually be nodding, lean over and pat the players on the back and whisper sweet somethings in their ears.

I have yet to see the "Randys", Cunneyworth or Ladouceur, doing any of that.

Why we need four coaches that don't talk to each other or the players is beyond me. Lars Eller said after the game that he was unaware that Jonas Gustavsson had taken over for James Reimer in the Toronto net for the second period.

There's your problem right there.

Linemates are also not talking to each other. All of the Habs vaunted leadership and chemistry has vanished. Likely lost to the same place my socks go whenever I throw them in the dryer.

Even players who tend to survive most of Martin's pureed line combinations seem disjointed. There were times when Tomas Plekanec and Michael Cammalleri couldn't find each other on the ice if they were wearing flashing neon signs, using a seeing eye dog and a GPS, let alone the back of a wide open net.

Flopping defense

On the defensive side, the defense corps is young and soft, but the veterans are not helping either. Josh Gorges is routinely making mistakes and P.K Subban is definitely experiencing some sophomore season slump.

As such, I hate seeing them paired up together.

In a couple of years the Habs blueline will be giving the opposition fits, but right now they are still cutting their teeth while I gnash mine.

The Coach

I know Jacques Martin is a favorite whipping boy of mine, but I really do try to be open minded with him. I want to like him and I want him to succeed, because that means my team succeeds and that will always be a good thing. And this regardless of who is wearing the jerseys or standing behind the bench.

Did anyone else notice Martin's demeanor on the Leafs first tying goal, as the Habs went into full panic mode? The usually bland-faced calm and give-nothing-away facade was gone and I saw nervousness, frustration and panic.

You didn't have to be a hockey fan or a Habs fan to notice it.

His nervousness, frustration and panic are not helping the Habs to overcome theirs—which is palpable from this side of the 50" high def.

His use of players in certain roles is head scratching to say the least.

Forget using Erik Cole on the power play anymore. How about anyone but Mathieu Darche—who has a grand total of three power play goals in his entire NHL career?

Darche also sees ice time on a 5-on-3 over proven goal scorers, in Cole.

Martin stated afterwards that Darche does good things on the power play in front of the net. Since he plays for the Canadiens and not the Leafs, I'm pretty sure clearing the puck down the ice does not qualify as a good thing. Though I suspect Ron Wilson would beg to differ.

Meanwhile, the Habs get scored on and they start running around like the Keystone Cops, instead of like a team that went deep into the playoffs two years ago. That same team took the eventual Cup champ, Boston Bruins, to sudden death overtime in Game Seven of their first round series last season.

I'm pretty sure I've seen better composure from QMJ hockey teams.

The Canadiens are two years into playing a puck possession, disciplined and defense oriented system. But right now, they look like they've either tossed their coach's system out the window or developed a severe case of retrograde amnesia.

I really don't know which it is, but if it's the latter then Martin ought to start whacking the players upside the head to see if it will help any. If you want confirmation that this strategy sometimes works, just ask my grandmother or mother.

Either Martin reminds them more forcefully or his players will end up tossing him out the window.

People crying for Martin's removal as Head Coach of the Habs - and yes I'm one of them - might want to take a moment to consider the alternatives. They're out there, but the leading candidates are not likely to thrill any kind of a majority, from what I can gather online or off.

The Habs need a boot in the pants. Another minor deal to augment the fourth line is unlikely to be sufficient.

Ultimately, like Jack Nicholson said: "Something's gotta give".

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Rosalyn used to frequent the old Forum during her early childhood when her father was a corporate season ticket holder, where she fell in love with Larry Robinson, so her lifelong obsession with the Habs is entirely his fault.

(Photo by Richard Wolowicz/Getty Images North America)

Posted in: Jacques Martin,kirk muller,montreal canadiens,randy cunneyworth,randy ladouceur